You’re a man in church leadership and want to help everyone in your church, but then a woman comes to you and confesses a porn problem. What do you do? If you’re like a majority of men in the U.S., you’ve been raised to believe that porn is a man’s…

“Why is no one talking about women and pornography?” That question comes up a lot. The other question that comes up a lot is “Do women really struggle with pornography?” I feel like the two practically answer each other.  Yes, women struggle with pornography and their stories are heartbreaking.   No,…

The rise of #metoo is more than just a trending hashtag and media story. It is ripping the lid off a culture marked by sexual exploitation and assault. It is a call for that culture to change, but how? Stories of sexual assault are not new.  Nor is it new…

Breaking right before the end of the purity series to talk about the new book!  Years ago, I wrote my first book, Love Done Right: Devos.  Last year, I decided that book needed a do-over.  That newly remodeled book will hit the mail (probably not the shelves) in just over…

Today, I am excited to share a guest post with you.  Rebecca Lemke is the author of The Scarlet Virgins: When Sex Replaces Salvation.  I value the perspective she brings to this discussion because she is married. Too often, when I talk about things like the purity culture, I think…

Over the years, perhaps courtesy of the “purity” movement, sex has become a little bit like fight club.  What’s the number one rule about fight club? We don’t talk about fight club. What’s the number one rule about abstinence?  We don’t talk about sex. At least that’s how it seems.…

The fundamental argument of the purity culture is that sex is meant to be enjoyed within the confines of a committed marriage.  Sexual activity of any form outside of that is not how God intended it.  I wholeheartedly agree. However, I wholeheartedly disagree with the approach of the purity movement.…

We’re talking about the idea of purity right now and I have to wonder, why so much of the Christian faith seems to center on sex.  One of the first books I wanted to write was going to be called, “True Love Does Not Wait.” I said that during a…

Purity was a big deal in the 90s.  I grew up with purity rings, purity pledges, purity conferences, books, and songs.  But, as an adult who speaks to teenagers, I have to ask myself, is “purity” outdated? I don’t mean the idea of abstinence, but the actual language itself.  Over…