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Beggar's Daughter

Communicating the Truth of God's Grace to a Generation of Women Trapped in Sexual Sin

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Featured, Pornography and the Church

Resources for Helping Pastors Address Pornography

(Updated August 2023) As we wrap up the Porn in Church series, I wanted to round up some resources for pastors. Before I do that, though, I wanted to offer…

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July 17, 2021
Featured, For Parents

“Boys Will Be Boys” is Killing our Men

Where do I even start? The past few weeks have been filled with sexual assault in the news.  There was the case of the high school student in Florida who…

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June 8, 2016
Featured, Women and Pornography

Boundaries, Discernment, and Why You Might Reconsider Redeeming Love

It’s as clear in my mind as if it happened yesterday. I was a first-year student at Bible college and had just confessed to a years-long struggle with hardcore pornography.…

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January 20, 2022
  • Pornography and Marriage

    What Does it Mean to Marry a “Leader?”

    I’ve seen a lot of talk in my circles recently about Christian women needing to marry a leader. I actually recorded a video on the topic for Instagram but then never posted it. Let me tell you the tale of two Instagram accounts. The first will remain unnamed, but it is an account that specializes in responding to bad relationship advice. It blew me away the number of “Christian” men who had absolutely horrid dating advice. Horrid. Misogynistic, unBiblical “standards” that they are preaching as gospel truth. Just the other day he posted a video response to a man who said “real” men don’t let women set boundaries, provide for…

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    You May Also Like

    Should We Just Watch Porn Together?

    February 27, 2021

    Five Tips for Staying Connected in the Bedroom

    February 11, 2023

    Should We Treat Porn Like Cheating?

    March 6, 2021
  • Resources,  Women and Pornography

    What Do I Need to Do to Stop Watching Porn?

    If you want to break free from a struggle with pornography, you may be wondering: What do I need to do to stop watching porn? What do I need to give up? Is there some sort of trick? Different “experts” may have different strategies. When I was first beginning my journey of freedom, the “course” I was using called for “radical amputation” of any sort of electronic device. No TV. No smartphone. This, the author believed, was the equivalent of “gouging out your right eye” which is what Jesus says in Matthew 5:29 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it…

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    You May Also Like

    The Journey of Quenched: Discovering God’s Abundant Grace for Women Struggling with Pornography and Sexual Shame

    January 28, 2023

    Resource Review: We Too by Mary DeMuth

    July 14, 2021

    Why There Aren’t More Resources for Christian Women Struggling with Pornography?

    June 2, 2023
  • Women and Pornography

    I’m a Christian Woman Who Struggled with Porn. This is the Hardest Part About Sharing My Story.

    In 2009, I started sharing my story about my struggle with porn addiction. I did so anonymously at first because I didn’t want to deal with people knowing this was my story. I felt like I was the only woman in that world who had this struggle. No one needed to hear my story. No one cared. In late 2010, I stood in a room at a conference in Canada. I was leading a breakout session for women on the topic of lust and the room was packed. Every chair was full, women stood around the room, and some even sat on the floor near where I was speaking. The…

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    You May Also Like

    Resource Review: The Great Sex Rescue by Sheila Wray Gregoire

    April 7, 2021

    Letting Go of the Shame and Regret of Sexual Sin

    September 26, 2012

    What Does Freedom From Pornography Look Like?

    July 24, 2021
  • Women and Pornography

    What Do You Do When Confession Has Consequences?

    When it comes to breaking free from pornography and other sexual sins, I talk a lot about confession. In fact, if you email me (or have emailed me) asking what you should do to help start your freedom journey, my answer will always be “you need to tell someone.” There’s a reason for that, but there’s also a lot of fear around “confessing.” What if I confess and they get mad? What if I confess and they don’t care? What if I confess and I am punished? I think it’s unfortunate that we as Christians so often use confession similar to how it is used in a crime documentary. We…

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    You May Also Like

    How Pornography Affected My Body Image (or, How Porn is Like Glitter)

    December 23, 2022

    Tips for Fighting Temptation During the Holidays

    November 25, 2021

    Moving On With Life When Your Pictures are Still Out There

    June 19, 2013
  • Resources

    The Flirtation Experiment and Why Intimacy Matters

    “When does the love fade away?” I was sitting in hair and makeup with Brittni De La Mora, a former porn actress and now leader of XXXchurch and Love Always Ministries. Brittni and I were speaking on a panel for CBN’s Unhooked: Purity in a Pornified World. It’s not often that I get an opportunity to talk with women in similar places of ministry and life. Brittni and her husband got married in 2016. My husband and I got married in 2018. We each had girls, three months apart. So, sitting in the room with her felt like an opportunity to gain some wisdom. My husband and I were just…

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    You May Also Like

    Resource Review: Talking Back to Purity Culture by Rachel Joy Welcher

    February 3, 2021

    Why There Aren’t More Resources for Christian Women Struggling with Pornography?

    June 2, 2023

    The Journey of Quenched: Discovering God’s Abundant Grace for Women Struggling with Pornography and Sexual Shame

    January 28, 2023
  • Featured,  Women and Pornography

    Boundaries, Discernment, and Why You Might Reconsider Redeeming Love

    It’s as clear in my mind as if it happened yesterday. I was a first-year student at Bible college and had just confessed to a years-long struggle with hardcore pornography. My three roommates didn’t know. They just knew I had stuff I was working through. During free time one day, one of my roommates looked up from the book she was reading. “Guys! Listen to this!” She began to quote several sentences from a “sex scene” in the book. It was veiled, and definitely not anything like the sex scenes I used to read at school on the library computers. Still, I recognized one when I heard one. She read…

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    You May Also Like

    Is There Hope After a Struggle with Pornography?

    April 13, 2023

    How Pornography Affected My Journey as a Mom

    August 7, 2021

    The Journey of Quenched: Discovering God’s Abundant Grace for Women Struggling with Pornography and Sexual Shame

    January 28, 2023
  • Women and Pornography

    Take “Break Free From Porn” Off Your To Do List

    How many times have you told yourself this time will be the last time? Have you ever tried to quit watching pornography? Stop masturbating? Stop lusting? Then you have probably discovered it isn’t exactly easy. It seems like it should be, right? Isn’t this what God wants us to do? Doesn’t He want us to stop? You would think, then, that we would just be able to wake up one day and that’s it. It’s over. We’re done and never look back. Easy peasy. Isn’t that what so many pastors seem to preach? Just stop. You want to stop. You try to stop. So why can’t you stop? It might…

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    You May Also Like

    I’m a Christian Woman Who Struggled with Porn. This is the Hardest Part About Sharing My Story.

    May 13, 2022

    Setting Up Recovery Groups For Women Who Struggle with Porn

    May 15, 2021

    Three Signs You Are Exploiting People

    July 31, 2021
  • Women and Pornography

    Tips for Fighting Temptation During the Holidays

    Is this time of year hard for you when it comes to your struggle? You would think all of the focus on gratitude and Jesus coming to earth would make it less likely for us to struggle. But that’s just not how it works. It’s important to remember that your struggle does not start when you pick up your phone or log on to your computer. It starts before that, and it can seem so much worse this time of year. Why? Well, if you’re in school, you are finishing up exams (hello, stress) followed by free time. If you are away from home, you’re coming back to family (and…

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    You May Also Like

    Take “Break Free From Porn” Off Your To Do List

    January 15, 2022

    Boundaries, Discernment, and Why You Might Reconsider Redeeming Love

    January 20, 2022

    What Do I Need to Do to Stop Watching Porn?

    June 3, 2022
  • For Parents

    How Do I Protect My Child from Pornography? Resources for Parents

    If you’re a parent in this digital age, you may be wondering, “How do I protect my child from pornography?” or “What do I do when my child has seen pornography?” This question is especially important as children are around technology and the internet for hours every day, especially those in school. Just how easy is it for children to find pornography? I’m glad you asked! But, you’re asking the wrong question. Stop assuming that your child has to be the one looking for pornography. Instead, ask yourself how easy is it for pornography to find your child. No parent wants to imagine that their kindergartener is going to go…

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    You May Also Like

    Porn and Parenting: How to talk to Your Child about Porn

    August 21, 2021

    How Pornography Affected My Journey as a Mom

    August 7, 2021

    The Best Age to Begin Talking to Kids About Pornography

    August 14, 2021
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