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What Boundaries Should You Have While Dating?
I recently received an email from a 14-year-old young man (definitely not my typical audience!) who read my once-viral post Kissing is Not Sex. He wanted to know more about boundaries and what sort of boundaries he should have while dating his girlfriend. Good. for. you, young sir! I recall many many (many) years ago sitting in church wondering the same thing. I wasn’t in a relationship at the time (I didn’t go on my first date until I was 27!) but was still curious about “the rules.” Unfortunately, the canned Christian response was almost always, “Stop asking where the line is and how close you can get to it…
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Tips for Fighting Temptation During the Holidays
Is this time of year hard for you when it comes to your struggle? You would think all of the focus on gratitude and Jesus coming to earth would make it less likely for us to struggle. But that’s just not how it works. It’s important to remember that your struggle does not start when you pick up your phone or log on to your computer. It starts before that, and it can seem so much worse this time of year. Why? Well, if you’re in school, you are finishing up exams (hello, stress) followed by free time. If you are away from home, you’re coming back to family (and…
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No, Singleness is Not a Punishment
I think this is why I’m still single. I don’t think God will ever allow me to get married. Not after what I’ve done. Before you run away, this is not another post on how “singleness is a gift” and how marriage will happen if you “are just content” or “just trust God enough.” I saw my share of those posts as a single woman and they just aren’t helpful. Singleness can be hard. Very hard and I’m not here to discredit that or ignore the fact that sometimes it feels like torture to watch all of your college roommates get married, or to be a bridesmaid in 20 different…
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Should I Get Married if I’m Addicted to Porn?
If you read my last post on saving sex for marriage, you might have caught that this is a topic I’m becoming increasingly more passionate about. My husband and I enjoy a beautiful, strong, marriage and it’s something I honestly wish for everyone. I believe it’s what God wants for us, and so many marriages are really hurting. I had to take a break after finishing that last post because my heart was so heavy. This month, we’re launching into a series that will tackle just a few of the questions I get regarding pornography and marriage. For the sake of every post in this series, I’m going to be…
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Does God Really Want Me to Save Sex for Marriage?
Let’s close out this Does God series with a zinger. I actually don’t know if it’s a zinger, but it’s a question that is being asked and one that we really need to be ok trying to answer: Does God really want me to save sex for marriage? It’s a fair question. A common question. And for some reason, a hard question to tackle. I thought I had a decent post on it and then literally just deleted the whole thing and started over… three times now. I’ve actually lost sleep over this post, wanting to be sure it contributed to a culture of grace and goodness and not shame.…
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Marriage Won’t Set You Free: Getting Real About Our Expectations
(Note: This post was originally written in 2013. As of August 2023- the Good Women Project site seems to be no longer updated and Lauren has moved on to different aspirations) I know… I’ve been writing a lot about marriage. It’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot. I’m single and 27; it’s what single 27-year-olds do, I guess. Usually, thinking about marriage leads us ladies into this manic depressive state of panic and dread. Thinking about marriage or a lack thereof leads to trouble. We start in with self-pity (oh, poor me), try to fake righteousness (but God must have something better), and then move on to stifled desires…