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Porn in Church: The One Word Christian Women Struggling with Porn Need to Hear
What if I told you there was one word that Christian women struggling with porn needed to hear? Just one word that could help eradicate shame and set them on the journey to freedom? What if one word could completely change the atmosphere of your church? Could it really be that simple? Five years ago, I had the privilege of speaking at the Set Free Summit, hosted by Covenant Eyes and Josh McDowell Ministries. It was a gathering of hundreds of pastors and ministry leaders addressing the issue of pornography use within the church. During my session, I shared about the shame experienced by a Christian woman struggling with pornography.…
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For the Female Porn Addict: What Delights You?
“Why do women watch pornography?” I get asked it often at speaking events, usually by older women or baffled men. For so long we’ve said porn is a man’s issue and have ignored the issue(s) women have with it. So, when I share about my own struggle with pornography and the fact that I’m not alone, some people struggle to understand why. Why would a woman watch something that is so degrading toward women? Why would a woman gain arousal from something that is blatantly unrealistic? Why would a woman consume a product that often glorifies rape and contributes to sex trafficking? My question in response is: Why would a…
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Sexual Assault and “Protecting the Christian Reputation”
Between the heroic stance of Rachael Denhollander, the continued thundering of the #metoo movement, and current cases in Christian churches and the “Christian” response to them, my newsfeeds are filled with chatter about sexual assault and the approach/mishandling of it, especially by Christian communities. I thought of writing this a month ago as I read up on the situation involving Andy Savage. I have written about how sexual assault is handled in churches before (here and here). Bottom line is, overall, we don’t seem to be that great at dealing with this in a way that is actually helpful to victims. Is that every church? Of course not. Can people…
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Porn in the Pew: How Do I Worship God When I’ve Fallen?
Ever felt inadequate? By its nature, pornography breeds feelings of physical inadequacy. We will never be pretty enough, tall enough, skinny enough, sexual enough, kinky enough, whatever it is, we will never be enough. Those feeling, thoughts, and lies can be absolutely crippling to our self-esteem, rendering us incompetent and far-from-confident women who see no value in their own existence. But there is a far more damaging aspect to pornography for a Christian woman. Pornography can make you feel spiritually inadequate. For that matter, sin can make us feel spiritually inadequate. “But Jessica,” you may say, “It is theologically correct that our sin separates us from God and that we…
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Thoughts on Donny Pauling (and a message for us all)
