Lust & FantasySex & SinglenessWomen & Pornography

Forsaking Fantasy: Words and Meditations

They say men think about sex a lot.  Men aren’t the only ones.

Yes, true story, women think about sex.  Shocker, I know.  Some of us think about it a lot and in a good “I want that” way, not a “Eww gross why is he thinking about that” way.  While sex is good and God-honoring and, I truly believe OK to be desired, it is not OK to obsess over it.  Still, some of us find ourselves locked in a lust-filled thought pattern, scrambling for a way to get out.

Lust is a tricky little thing.  It isn’t like a cigarette.  You can’t rip your brain out and put it in the trash (though some of us, I’m sure, wish we could).  We have to learn how to control our thoughts because they cannot be altogether eliminated.  You can’t wake up one morning and say to yourself, “I’m not going to think today.”  We are always thinking.  In most cases, our brain and memory are helpful, in other cases, not so much.  When you are a woman who struggles with lust, no moment of spare time is safe- a lust addiction is by far one of the most portable addictions.

Our favorite verse

I was recently reflecting on Psalm 19:14.  We’ve heard it before.  Many of us have said it to ourselves before.  We’ve memorized it as part of a mantra against lust.  It might be on a sticky note somewhere.  It’s that first part that we are holding onto.

“Let the words of my mouth, and the meditations of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord…”

It’s a beautiful prayer to pray.  It’s a good and glorious goal for us to have, especially for those of us who struggle with a lustful thought life.  It is a piercing verse crying out that not only our words would be acceptable but also that the meditations of our hearts (thoughts) would be acceptable.  Ouch.

As I thought on that, I found comfort in the whole verse.

If it ended right there, I know I would be in trouble.  I would be hopeless.  If it were just a command, “Jessica, the words of your mouth and your thoughts need to be acceptable to me.  I am the Lord,” Jessica would be a goner.  I would be helpless and completely unable to meet that standard.  It is a high standard, not just “make sure they are good” or “make sure that you think about {this} the most” or “make sure a majority are acceptable.”  No, this is talking about all of them and setting the standard to God’s standard.  Double ouch.

The End of The Verse

But the verse does not end there.  It goes on to address God, Himself.  It calls Him by name.


“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my [firm, impenetrable] Rock and my Redeemer.”

King James:

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.


I find it interesting that those two references to God are used here.  There are hundreds of names and references for God used throughout the New Testament.  He is our Strong Tower, Refuge, Shield, Defense, Salvation, Deliverer, Kinsman Redeemer– the list goes on.  Why these two?

Think about it.  How encouraging would it be if this verse ended “… O Lord, my judge.”  How much sense would it make if this verse ended, “O Lord, my defense.”  I think these two references are made with a purpose.  They speak to the need.  He is Lord, but He is more than Lord.

Lord sets the standard.  My words and my thoughts are to be acceptable in the sight of the Lord, but He has not left me to do this on my own.  He is my Rock- the strength I will need to accomplish this task.  He is my Redeemer- the motivation I need to do this, and the grace for when I fail.

We were not supposed to do this in our own power.  He is standing at the ready- our Rock and our Redeeming Lord.