PornographyPurity & Freedom

Accountability 101: Introduction

I’ve done a few posts and mini-series here and there about accountability, but it’s been a while.  As time passes, our perspectives deepen and we come to a better understanding of things.  Over the past few months, I’ve seen so many e-mails from women about accountability, asking tough questions about accountability:

Is telling my pastor ‘enough?’

Who do I tell?

What does that first conversation look like?

Is a group OK or should I go one-on-one?

Should I seek professional help too?

Should I ask my husband/boyfriend/mother/father to be my accountability partner?

What do you do if they say no?

What does an accountability partner do?

And the list goes on.  I woke up one morning in October at 3 am with those recent e-mails coursing through my head and thought I needed to do what I could to answer those questions.

So, for the next several weeks (alongside the Triggers series and ‘regular’ posts) we’re going to be walking through the ins and outs of accountability.  I hope to answer some of the most common questions I am asked and maybe some of the more important ones people are afraid to ask.  I’ll be bringing in guests to share tips from their own experience, and will hopefully be able to literally put some tools in your hands to help you.

Why I Care So Much About Accountability

I have long believed that accountability is vital to finding and walking in freedom.  It removes barriers of secrecy and pride.  Without those walls down, we can easily trick ourselves into believing that our problem isn’t really that bad, or that it isn’t even a problem at all.

Real quick, though, I want to lay the groundwork for what I mean by accountability, because I understand that it might be a little archaic or Christianese for some people.  I’ll shred it apart later but if you want a real basic definition of accountability, it is this:

Refusing to fight for freedom all on my own and inviting someone specific to join me in the fight.

That’s really what it boils down to.

Not Just For Porn

Again, I’ll pull this apart later (you have no idea how much I want to write everything all at once!), but accountability isn’t just for porn addicts.  We have this idea that it is for ‘super sinners’ but accountability is supposed to be a naturally present part in our lives as Christians.  Ongoing accountability about any sin in our lives is Biblical.

That being said, please take the information in this series as information for life.  The steps and tools will, hopefully, be applicable to many situations, not just those involving sexual sin.

I want to hear from you

I don’t write these things just to hear (see?) myself write.  Throughout this series, if you have a question or even disagree with something, please let me know.  If you want me to explain an idea further please let me know.

You can contact me using the form here or via Facebook.

I’m in this for the long haul and am very excited to share this series with you.



  1. As a firm believer in accountability (and on my 5th accountability partner!), I’m looking forward to this series.

  2. […] that we have a clear understanding of what, exactly, we are talking about.  As I said in the last post, a basic definition of accountability is […]